Pornography Addiction

Many men, and an increasing percentage of women, are finding themselves out of control in their use of pornography, particularly because porn is so readily accessible via the Internet. What often starts because of normal sexual desire and curiosity can become a pattern, then a habit, then a compulsion. Problems with compulsive use of pornography are sometimes called an "addiction." Experts disagree about whether a behavior, such as using porn, is an "addiction" in the same way that one becomes addicted to alcohol or another drug; however, the label used to define the problem is less important than finding ways to address the problem. People with a family history of addictions may be more at risk. A history of neglect or physical or sexual abuse and young/inappropriate exposure to porn or sex may also be risk factors.

Following are some signs that porn use has progressed to compulsion:

  1. Escalating amounts of time spent using and/or thinking about porn; reducing or eliminating time spent on relationships, non-porn activities, and responsibilities
  2. Needing more time with or more intense or bizarre types of porn to get aroused
  3. Continued use of porn despite negative consequences (e.g., problems with school, work, relationships, money)
  4. Feeling out of control with porn use
  5. Lying about, hiding, or making excuses about porn use
  6. Frequent thoughts about porn when you can't use it; negative feelings or stress when you aren't using it
  7. Trying to cut back or quit use of porn but being unable to
  8. Using porn as your primary way to cope with stress, loneliness, and difficult emotions
  9. Progression from passive (e.g., videos) to interactive porn and/or paid sex (e.g., pay-for-service webcams, visiting prostitutes) and/or using  types of porn that conflict with your beliefs and values

A person who is "addicted" to pornography is likely to have several of the experiences and feelings on the following list:

  1. Problems in relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners, including trouble creating deep or lasting connections
  2. Lack of interest in or sexual dysfunction with real-world partners, including erectile dysfunction, delayed ejaculation, and inability to orgasm
  3. Loss of many hours, sometimes entire days, to porn use
  4. Loss of interest in non-porn activities such as work, school, socializing, family, and exercise
  5. Trouble at work or school related to poor performance, misuse of company/school equipment, and/or public use of porn
  6. Intense feelings of depression, shame, and isolation
  7. Financial problems
  8. Physical injury caused by compulsive masturbation
  9. Legal issues (e.g., getting arrested for possessing child pornography)

If you’re concerned that you may have a problem with pornography, consider getting help from a mental health professional, preferably one with specialized training in sex addiction treatment. Additionally, you may wish to try some of the following:

  1. Create a behavior change plan, such as setting a timer for usage, keeping a log of moods when using porn, and increasing time spent socializing face to face and taking part in non-porn–related activities.
  2. Consider using software or other methods to block pornography websites.
  3. Focus on other areas where you need help, such as building social skills, overcoming shyness, and improving overall coping skills.
  4. Avoid or cut back on alcohol or other drugs, which interfere with impulse control.
  5. Get screening and treatment for other problems, like depression or anxiety, if needed.
  6. Seek face-to-face or online support through a 12 Step sexual addiction recovery group, such as Sex Addicts Anonymous, Sexual Recovery Anonymous, or Sexaholics Anonymous.